My 2019 Vision Board

Hey everyone!

I am back after a very long writing break. I just needed some time to recharge. I think I will write a post about it sometime soon but for now, we are taking 2019 in stride and talking about my goals!

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I decided to make a vision board because every successful blogger or Youtuber I’ve seen has made one. I thought I may as well make one. Not only to mooch off the success of way more talented people but also because maybe it will work? If I have to see what I want in life every day maybe it will kick my ass into gear to actually do things. We’ll see.

I also made a video of me making this vision board and explaining it if you want to see it. I also have a Youtube channel and would love if you guys checked it out. I posted every day during the month of December for Vlogmas this year.

Let’s get started on what my goals are for this year. At the end of December, I had an overwhelming feeling of need for change. I really wanted 2019 to be better than 2018. I was feeling motivated and like I had the world at my feet. I can do anything and all I need to do is set my mind to it.

  1. Going Vegan

One of my top goals for this year is to go Vegan. I have always wanted to go Vegan. I actually was a vegetarian for about 2 years and then I met my boyfriend. My boyfriend is not vegetarian so I ended up eating meat and meat products with him. I also grew up in a meat-eating family so it wasn’t much of a foreign concept. After eating not very healthy for the last few months I decided I wanted a change. I honestly believe going Vegan is better for you and so does my boyfriend so he is joining me with this goal. There are a lot of people that will disagree with me. That’s okay. I just have done research and now know that eating plant-based it just what I want to do in life. So on January 1st, it started. We have cheated a few times since starting but it’s mostly in terms of cheese haha. I knew it wouldn’t be as easy as going cold turkey but I hope by the end of 2019 we will be fully Vegan.

2. Mental Health

I had a rough time in my first year of college. I have talked about this on multiple occasions. I skip school and get sick a lot. I decided that I was not doing that anymore. I was tired of ruining my own chances in life. I decided that I was taking 2019 to heal myself. I am working on my anxiety always. I just want 2019 to be the year where I get everything under control. I am tired of feeling sick and like I can’t leave my home. I’m not saying that I will be perfect. I am sure I will still get days where I can’t leave the house. I want to make it less than last semester though. That is my goal! I also want to meditate more and do yoga. I want to be more in touch with myself and put my feelings first and needs first.

3. Weight Loss

I want to lose weight. This is one of the biggest new years resolutions of all time. I believe in my heart that 2019 is the year for me to heal myself both mentally, physically and spiritually. Eating better and focusing on my mental health are the stepping stones for weight loss I think. I am at the heaviest I’ve ever been. I actually talk about this in a blog post from a few months ago. I don’t hate how I look per se but I do feel unhealthy and would like to tone up.  So I got a gym membership (who am I kidding? I’ve been paying for it for 6 months and have never gone) and I stopped buying UberEats. Hopefully, by the end of 2019, I will be in a healthier space.

4. Travelling + Seeing My Bestie!

I didn’t get to travel much in 2018. Travelling is one of those things I love the most in the world but I don’t get to do it too often. My goal this year is to really take the leap and go on as many trips as I can. I actually bought a passport holder that I leave on my desk. I believe in putting out into the universe what you want. I want to travel so I bought a passport holder to motivate me to save and plan more trips. Travelling is also important because my best friend lives like over 8 hours away. I miss her so much and really want to make more time to see her this year. There is no excuse. There are enough days in a year to make something work.

5. “Don’t stop until you’re proud”

My quote for this year is the one above. I really want to make this blog and my YouTube channel a full-time income. I hate working for other people and really just want to be my own boss. I actually photoshopped 1000 subscribers under my YouTube channel because I hope that this year will be the year that I will finally be qualified for Ads. I keep saying that I want to prioritize my blog and YouTube as a business but there’s always something that gets away, you guessed it, it’s myself! So this year I created a what I like to call a “content creating schedule” I literally bought an agenda and started scheduling in when things need to be done. It’s keeping my accountable. I want to say it’s working so far, I mean this blog post is up isn’t it?

So those are my 5 goals or New Year’s resolutions or habits or whatever you want to call them for 2019. I thought this was the best way to jump into 2019 with new content for you guys! I will be seeing you guys every Tuesday and Thursday! I hope you liked this post. I would really love to know if you guys have any goals for 2019? Or do you not believe in making goals?

Also, if you want to hear more from me I would love if you subscribed to my YouTube Channel where I post every Tuesday and Thursday also. Like always my posts and videos always go up at 9pm eastern time! I hope to see you guys over there!

You can find me here! Also, make sure to subscribe to my emailing list!!

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400$ Forever 21 Haul!!

Hey everyone!

If you read my last post then this is for you. If you did then I tried to post a try on haul from the Labor Day weekend and I just couldn’t get myself to do it. I just felt too insecure. As much as I didn’t want to post myself due to my own insecurities, I still wanted to share with you guys what I got. It would be a waste almost if I didn’t.

So I went a little crazy during the Labor Day weekend. Forever 21 had a 50% sale on all sale items making everything dirt cheap. I spent like 400$ for both me and my boyfriend.

I heard a lot of horror stories of Forever 21’s customer service so when I saw there was a shipping error I got myself ready for a fight. To my surprise, the person I talked to was so sweet and fixed everything no problem. The last time I bought from Forever 21 I got my stuff in 2 days. There is a warehouse 20 minutes from me. This time it took a bit longer. I could be because of how many items I bought or of the high demand but it took 7 or 8 days. That is pretty much the time they advertise when you choose free shipping which is 5 to 7 days.

Also, another thing I wanted to mention is that I am on average a size 12-14. At Forever 21 their size 12 is more like an 8 or 10. It’s super weird because I  am too big for the “regular” or “average” sizes but too small for their “plus sizes”. They have a whole size missing. So I bought a lot of things in an ex-large or other bigger sizes than what I usually am. It’s funny because as much as I couldn’t post my try on haul I have no problem with the sizes of the clothes. To me, it’s just a number that means nothing and changes wherever you shop.

So anyways enough blabbing. Here is everything I bought!

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You can get it HERE!

You can get it HERE!

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You can get it HERE!

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You can get it HERE!

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You can get it HERE!

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You can get it HERE!

I also got a couple of other little things but they were put away because they don’t fit. They’re like a size too small so I just put it away for when I get back down to my normal weight and stop eating McDonalds haha.

I hope you liked everything I got. I am hoping to make it up to you guys by doing a lookbook soon for fall. I will try and feature some of these items in the haul. I also tried to link everything I bought if you’re interested in checking them out!

I will see you guys on Monday!

You can find me here! Also, make sure to subscribe to my emailing list!!

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*All links from MagicLinks or Shop Style Collective are affiliate links. I make a small percentage of things bought through this link or just clicking on them.

My Own Insecurities Caused My Try On Haul to Fail!

Hey everyone!

I know I haven’t been as active on my blog and YouTube this week like usual. It’s because I have a problem. A body confidence problem. I filmed a whole video and just couldn’t find myself to edit it. I just didn’t like how my body looked in the try on haul I was filming.

I’ve always been a confident person but when it comes to my weight I have more of a problem. I’m not fat by any means. I don’t hate my body either but I know when I need to lose weight. When I’ve been eating a lot of junk I can see and feel a difference in my body. I just don’t feel as good about myself as I would when I feel healthy and have been eating good.

So, I have a whole try on haul that I won’t be posting on my channel. I thought about posting it just because it could all be in my head. I decided not to because I just don’t want to put that on my channel and blog. I want to share with you guys someone who is healthy and I am not healthy right now.

I will still make a blog post about my haul but I will be taking new photos and it will go up next week. I just wanted to talk to talk to you guys about confidence and weight loss and talking about our bodies.

I have insecurities. I know that it’s probably more in my head than anything else but it eats me alive. I just can’t find the confidence to say “this is me” and “deal with it”. I know I don’t look healthy. Not to say anything against plus size woman and men or anyone with any body type. This is more about me and my mental state. I find that I am harsher on my body when I know I haven’t eaten well or been working out.

As a blogger especially a lifestyle blogger who talks about clothes and life and makeup and whatever it is, I have to show myself. I have a hard time showing myself when I don’t feel beautiful. It’s something I struggle with. I can’t image people who have immense followings who always have to show up do it. Are these people confident in their bodies and how they look or do they just get over it and move on?

I am hoping one day to figure it out and be able to see myself in a better light when I do gain weight. I don’t believe that we should always be obsessed with our weight. I don’t want my life to revolve around how I look and the number on the scale.

Do any other bloggers feel down about themselves sometimes and not want to post online? In a world that is so preoccupied with followers and likes it really is hard to put yourself out there to be scrutinized.

What do you guys think? How do you guys feel about insecurity and the online world?

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Monthly Loves // August 2018

Hey everyone!

August just flew by. It feels like yesterday that I was getting excited for school and going on vacation. We are finally reaching fall making it almost a year of doing these posts. I know people are getting tired of monthly favourites. I get it, it’s same old, same old. I on the other hand like making them. I find them fun and I feel like it’s more personal than anything else. I love that I can go back and see what I was obsessed with a few months ago or in this case almost a year ago.

I really wanted to share a few things with you guys that I loved during August. Something I realized while writing this post is that I have a hard time writing them sometimes. It’s like I completely forget what I liked to do for a whole month. Does anyone else get that way?

1.After by Anna Todd

So I don’t know if you guys remember but I put this book in my summer reading list. You can read that post here. I read this book when it was still a FanFiction on Wattpad. At the time I was still young and thought that Harden and Tessa had a relationship to look for, sorta. I wasn’t a complete naive little girl but pretty close. It was like I had this allusion that a relationship had to have fights for it to be one that was worth fighting for. Now that I am reading it again as a 19-year-old in a steady relationship, yeah that’s now how it works. At the same time though I don’t find it too unrealistic. I know there is a lot of controversy over this book and how Harlen is “abusive” to Tessa. I am still on the first book but I would have to disagree, I don’t find it abuse. I think it could be a relatively toxic relationship but no abusive. Also, it’s a book. I’m not reading it to get a real representation of life, I want to be in another world for a while. I am devouring it and forgot how many sex scenes there were, oops. I ended up buying the whole series of books on my vacation to ensure that I would be able to finish them. All in all, I have been loving this book and am so so so excited for the movie to come out next year.

2. Archer (TV Show)

So my boyfriend got me hooked on this show. We have been watching it just casually and I am in love. I’m not usually one for adult cartoons. I was never allowed to watch them as a kid, with reason, so I never really got into it. This show though is amazing. I love how dry it is and just how crude it is. It’s the best show for when I just want to chill and not really use any brain power. We put it on when we just want to relax. I love a good show where I can just laugh and not really have to think about it. If you’re looking for a stupid show with crude humour on your Netflix, this is my suggestion. It’s not for everyone, there are some really inappropriate humour moments but if you don’t mind those kinds of things then this show is golden.

3. My student planner

Okay so maybe this is cheating or a bit of self promo but I swear it’s a favourite. If you guys had no idea or well…don’t care, I have created a student planner. It has been helping me a lot since starting school. It really is the best student planner I have seen out there. Probably because I created it for my specific needs. Regardless, if you’re looking for something to just keep your organized and on top of your school game then this is the planner for you. I have been really scared about selling something for the first time but you have to lead with fear and not let it consume you. I have it up on my Etsy for a really affordable price, 5$! You can’t beat that, a lot of student planners go for 10 to 20$, sometimes even more. You should really check it out.

You can get it HERE!

4. Hauls

So maybe I really am a basic white girl. I have been watching hauls on Youtube like crazy. Why? I have no idea. I just like watching people trying on clothes or showing off stuff. I think it feeds my need for spending money. I’m going, to be honest, money burns in my pocket. I do have a hard time saving sometimes. Watching hauls really gives me other people’s opinions on things so I don’t buy it if it sucks. I also like to see other people’s style. I put them on when I’m cleaning my apartment or folding some laundry. It’s just a great way to escape and pass the time.

5. Getting on a schedule

So I’ve mentioned this briefly in my How to Nail Syllabus Week post I talked about creating a schedule. So I’ve been trying to stick to it and it’s been working really well. I’ve been going to bed around 10-11pm and I wake up at 7 am. I sometimes wake up around 6 naturally and make myself sleep the extra hour. I love waking up and not feeling exhausted. It’s super nice to just feel rested and awake. I’m not a morning person, not at all. So, feeling awake and rested when I get up early is really something different for me. Before creating this schedule I would always wake up so tired. I would try and sleep 8 hours but it would be different every night and usually end up being 6 hours of sleep.

So there we are with the same old same old. I hope you guys aren’t getting tired with monthly favorites. If you are, why is that? If not, do you agree they’re like a fun little archive? What are some of you guy’s favorites?  I would love to know!

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My First Week Of School // Back To School 2018

Hey everyone!

The first week of school is finally over! I hope everyone made it out alive. For those of you who haven’t started yet, I wish you luck. For those who have, are you as tired as me?

I am fortunate to say that I love the program I am in. I love what I am studying. I know that the Arts, Literature and Language: multidisciplinary program (a college Art Degree) is the best fit for me. For some of you guys who don’t know my past struggles with school, I have a YouTube video all about why I dropped out of college. In brief, I went from a horrible horrible situation in my life to one where I feel like I can actually have a future. Though I was pursuing an art degree at another school it was not where I wanted to be.

My first week has been crazy. It has been trying to figure out a new sleeping schedule, it’s been figuring out how to eat, yup how to eat and where all my classes are and if I like the teachers. For the most part, I’ve been falling asleep super early and naturally waking up at 6 am yet I force myself to sleep till 7. I don’t know what’s wrong with me but it’s like I hate the idea of being up at 6. Like why wake up at a reasonable hour and get ready for school when you can rush?

I’ve also been eating less because I don’t have time to eat. Some of my days are back to back classes from 9:30 am to 5:30 pm. I can’t just eat a full meal during class so it’s become eating little bits every now and again when I can. Also, cafeteria food is just not worth it! It was so expensive. I’m bringing my own food or waiting it out next time. (Which I usually do but the other day I was in a pinch).

So far I’ve been really liking my classes, even the classes I wasn’t too sure about. I’m excited to see where my classes will take me. All my teachers seem awesome and the actual content is interesting and engaging.

I have a locker buddy who is super nice but I’ve only seen her once. I leave most of my stuff in my locker much like I said in my backpack post. It’s been working out really well. I’m really happy with my decision to take fewer things to school. It has made my life so much easier. The only thing I will be adding to my bag is Tylenol because I’ve been getting a lot of headaches at school since it’s so loud and I think I’m tired.

I own an Apple watch. Over the summer I didn’t really wear it but I think I’m going to start wearing it more often. I noticed there were times where I wanted to know what the time was but some teachers are super strict about phone use. So I’m going to start wearing my watch so I can see the time. It’s such a super simple thing but I’m so used to using a phone to check the time. It doesn’t help that very few of the classrooms in my school have clocks. WHY? I don’t know! But I would love to know why.

So this is basically a sum up of my week. I’m super happy and can’t wait for the rest of this semester. I would love to know how everyone else’s first week is going? If this is not your first week of school I would still love to hear from you guys too!

Also if you guys didn’t see my last post I have created a Student Planner! You can purchase my planner on ETSY for is on sale right now for only 1.50$ for a limited time!!!! I swear that it is the best planner for your money and it will help you like crazy! Check it out here!

You can find me here! Also, make sure to subscribe to my emailing list!!

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Why I Don’t Use a Backpack! // Back To School 2018

Hey everyone!

It’s back to school season! Who else is super excited to go back to school, cause I know I am? I thought I would make a back to school series for the next few weeks leading up to school starting. I will be going back to college this year for my second semester and I am really in love with what I’m studying. I really wanted to share my tips and tricks and maybe even some inspo for you guys for back to school.

So I know the title may be surprising to everyone. No backpack? Then what do you use? Now, let’s start at the beginning before we get ahead of ourselves. I have always used a backpack since my first day of pre-school all the way up to last year. I have had them all, the ones with my favourite animated characters, the suitcase backpack, the fashionable backpack, you name it I had it. Last year I ended up using a very ugly but sturdy backpack. I was just lugging around so much stuff that I needed something that could hold all my stuff.

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This year I decided I was tired of it. I was tired of carrying around all this shit that I didn’t need. I was tired of my bag being so heavy for no reason. So I decided this year that I was done with it. I was not living that hell again. I bought myself a large purse and said everything is going to fit in here whether I like it or not.

You can actually grab my exact bag here. I love Aldo! Their bags are always amazing! Honestly, if you’re looking for a good quality bag they are the place to go.

Now it was time to get rid of all those extra things. I started off first with my notebook. I had the amazing idea of using a 5 subject notebook last year for all my classes. I think it was just super easy to know that I had all my notes for all my classes at all times. The only problem is that the notebook was heavy. So I was super excited when I saw that they sold 5 subject notebooks but smaller.

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Then it was to take out the 2 or 3 pencil cases I had. I only very used like three things, a pencil, an eraser and a pen. I didn’t need all the colourful pens and the sharpies and all the extra little things I had in my pencil cases. I downsized to one pencil case that really has the bare minimum. The only thing I added to the three things listed above was white out and highlighters and one sharpie. Now it’s light and I only have to worry about one pencil case.

Next, I decided to get rid of the three agendas. Yes, I had three agendas. One for school and one for personal/ school stuff. I decided to condense everything into one agenda. It’s actually a teacher’s planner. I bought it for like 1$ at Target when I went to visit my friend Lauren. I realized a teacher planner was perfect to see when my homework and exams were. I also noticed I never really used my personal agenda. I just didn’t think to use it. Everything is already on my phone so I didn’t need it. That again frees up a lot of space.

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School books. They are a pain in my ass. Now that I’m in college I have a lot more textbooks. Last year I left all my textbooks at home and brought them to school when I needed them. I had a locker, everyone! Yet I chose to have all my books at home. This year I am determined to do a 360 and bring home the books I need rather than have to lug them to school every day.

I was bringing a water bottle and a travel cup to school every day. I would have my tea in one and my water in the other. Liquids get heavy! Plus I would just have an empty travel cup to carry when I was done my tea. I don’t believe I need to drink a tea to be awake in the morning. I prefer just drinking water. I feel like a nice cup of cold water in the morning wakes me up better than any caffeine does. So I am dropping the caffeine in the morning from now on.

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Two books usually ended up in my bag. In case I got bored with the one book I was ready I would bring another one. So yeah, I will be sticking to one book at a time. I don’t think I need to make it clear that books get heavy. I will be working on not bring a ridiculous amount of books too school.

I have never once used a personal hygiene bag every in my life. I have never used a toothbrush or deodorant or floss or band-aids or any of those little things. They were just taking us space in my bag. The only things I do use is Tylenol/Advil and a tampon. So I will leave a small container of pain relievers in my bag and tampons when I need them. I will probably have a separate bag for the days I have gym class with deodorant and perfume because I have a class after. That I will leave at home and just throw it in my bag on the days that I will need it. Other than that it’s really a waste of space to have all those things on a daily bases. If it works for you that’s awesome but for me, it’s just clutter.

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So these are all the reasons why I will not be using a backpack every again. I want to have a more minimalist school year. I wrote this post not to make anyone think that my way is the only way but more to not make the same mistakes as me. You can put all the things I’m bringing to school into a backpack. I just simply chose a bag because to me it’s more fashionable.

I want to know, do you guys bring backpacks to school? Are any of you stuck in the same runt as me bringing too much stuff to school? Leave me to comment I would love to know.

You can find me here! Also, make sure to subscribe to my emailing list!!

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Why Did I Do This? – Day #31

Hey everyone!

My 30 days of blogging has come to an end. Today is my last day. I thought I would wrap this up with my reasons behind doing a 30 day of blogging. I gave a bit of an intro to my 30 days of blogging right before starting but never made a blog post about it.

I want to begin with what my mindset was a month ago. I knew I had not been posting often and I felt really bad. I was in this bit of a grunt were I wasn’t very motivated and I was feeling really discouraged. I was off my posting schedule and I was just posting content just to post. I was feeling ashamed.

Due to me moving I had taken a mini break from posting on my blog to focus on moving in and adjusting to living with someone else. After I adjusted I just wasn’t ready to go back to writing on this blog so I took more time off. By the time I told myself I need to start posting I just wasn’t into it anymore. I had no motivation to do it.

I had actually been planning to do another month of blogging back during the school year. I knew that over the summer I would have the time to dedicate to my blog. So I had all the posts for July already planned and all I had to do was do it. So I decided maybe it would be the push I need to start blogging again and it was.

I know have a deeper understanding for how hard it is to be a full-time blogger or just a blogger in general. It is not easy to give 100% of creativity at all time. I give props to any blogger who doesn’t give up and keeps blogging even when they are feeling unmotivated. I also think it’s okay to say that you can’t do it and you need a break. Blogging takes a lot out of you.

Now what? I am more motivated than ever to go back to blogging. I love it and I need reminders like these that force me to blog to remember. I feel like I’m someone that needs to think other’s are expecting something from me to stay on track. I also believe that it is way harder for bloggers with low follow counts to stay motivated. The more I blog the more people start to follow or read my posts and the more I am motivated to continue.

I am hoping to get back on my blogging schedule and work more and more on my blog and social media. I really want to push and stay motivated to grow my blog. It get’s hard when you don’t believe in yourself. I believe I am the only person that is in control of where my blog goes and I will be doing what I can to get it to where I want it to be.

So anyways this is why I decided to blog for a month. Will I ever do it again? Most likely. Do I think it’s hard? Yes. Do I think it’s worth it? For sure. Now I want to hear from you guys. Would you guys ever blog for a month just to get back your blogging juices?

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