What am I even doing this year??

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So as everyone who read my blog post about graduation knows, I’ve finally finished my high school. (A hundred years later, I know) But what am I doing from here on out?

Well it’s not exactly that simple. I had previously gone to college before finishing my high school. What were they thinking letting me in?? I failed out because it was in French and well we all know that story.

Since I failed out of college it’s been very hard to get into an English one. My high school grades are great but my college ones suck. I’m sure you guessed it, college grades are more important.

So what am I doing this year? I decided to do two things. The first being applying to a school out of my province. (There’s like only 3 English colleges close to my home, making getting in very difficult to get in because of the lack of options for Anglophones.) The second being applying to nigh school. I will be doing college credit courses till I get an answer from Algonquin. The night school starts earlier here than Algonquin starts. The credited courses will help improve my college grades in general making it easier to get into a college close to me.

The ultimate goal is to be back in college in a communications program by Winter 2018. I will admit jumping through hoops for so long has been very frustrating. All I want to do is learn and the system is making it close to impossible. I do know that everything happens for a reason. What I go through is to bring me to a bigger and better purpose in life.

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Heartbreak: The Update

It has been two days since I talked about the inevitable. It maybe surprising to hear but a lot of things have changed since then. Some good and some bad.

I was told by a my ex boyfriend that he didn’t love me anymore. Nothing is more earth shattering than being told by the person you love that they don’t love you. It’s actually a worst fear of mine. So I guess I get to say that I faced one of my worst fear and survived.

I applied to a college 2 hours away from where I currently live. I took a leap of faith. My mother claims it’s my mid break up crisis. I agree. When you get out of a relationship you become impulsive, or at least I do. I start being rebellious and pushing my own limit. I needed a drastic change so I applied for late admissions at Algonquin College, I cut my hair and I bought a Macbook with the money I was saving for a vacation with him.

Now happy news for some, foolish for others. I got back together with my ex boyfriend. After pathetically begging on the phone for 3 hours on how we need to try again he agreed. Our situation is complicated. Distance being a huge factor. We have been in a long distance relationship for 6 months. It takes a toll on you. It’s hard to keep a spark alive when you see each other once a month.

Now I am in no way claiming I am an expert but all those advice pages are liars. Every woman in my life told me that I needed to cut off all communication with my Ex. It would make him miss me and then we would get back together. I know him, I know us. That would have never worked. It would have pushed him away. He would have just never talked to me again. He’s the kind of man that needs to be sat down and talked to. So go with your gut feeling. I did and I got him to try again and fight for our relationship.

No break up is perfect, not all of them have a happy ending. I am blessed. I know I am. Though I am realistic and I know that it may not end the way I want. He doesn’t love me anymore. That is a big order to fill. I know that somethings are worth it. I know in deep in my heart that if he was completely not in love with me anymore he wouldn’t be trying.

In the future I will try and make a post on how I won him back or I will explain what went wrong. Writing helps me figure things out. It helps me sort through my emotions. So I’m sorry my blog has been a diary for the last week. I promise next week is all about back to school!

Heartbreak

I didn’t want to make this post if I was being honest. I’m someone who likes to keep my private life private. I hate talking about really personal things because it leave room for judgement. I decided to share anyways because I know I’m not the only one going through it and people need to hear that it’s okay to be sad.

I am heartbroken and it’s okay. It’s so bad that I’ve lost motivation to do anything. I feel like there’s this stigma after a break up that you have to put yourself together and become this boss ass bitch that doesn’t need no man. I’m here to say that you don’t have to always be okay. It is perfectly normal to feel like your world has fallen apart.

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It’s really hard to be in a place where you’re fine and doing okay. I have all my friends always telling me I deserved better and that I’m too good for him but I don’t feel it. I actually don’t want to believe it. I don’t want better I had the best and I am not too good, I was just right.

I even feel stupid sometimes. I miss him dearly and what if he doesn’t miss me at all? (No contact rule is in motion) I don’t want to be that person that misses someone that doesn’t miss you. It’s like my worst fear.

All I can says is that breaking up is hard and you don’t have to be this fierce person expects you to be. I tried, I bought myself a Macbook with the vacation money I was saving for our vacation together and I cut my hair extremely short. It’s all fierce things but it doesn’t make you feel better permanently.

 

Lac Mégantic: Through My Eyes 2017

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I will admit that I wasn’t the most ecstatic in the world to be going to Lac Mégantic. The last time I had been here, 3 years ago to be exact, was a disaster. We were sleeping on the floor of my grandparents cramped camper. Just to put it lightly, we were cranky and always on top of each other. It created some attitude. We need our space.

This year we decided to say at our own place so there wouldn’t be a repeat. The place we stayed at was incredible. It had the most gorgeous view of the lake and the mountains. I would honestly buy this place if I had half a million to put into a second home but like most, no luck. So I guess I just had to soak up it in as much as I can while I was there.

I think for the first time in awhile I actually feel in love with a vacation destination. I climbed a mountain, I got to pet a bear and just sit by the lake. There was no waking up at the crack of dawn, we woke up towards 9:30-10. There was no take out. We bought groceries and ate home cooked meals. (Side note: I think I lost weight this trip. Nothing crazy. Just eating at regular times and my strange lack of appetite.)

I feel relaxed. It’s almost strange feeling relaxed after a family vacation. I’m sure i’m not the only one who gets what I mean. It may have to do with the fact that I got my own queen bed to myself and my own space to disappear.

Lac Mégantic Through My eyes video.

Whatever the reason, I even experienced what feels like a profound calling. It was like I suddenly understood what I need to do with my life. I need to be a blogger. Maybe it’s fate but my blog traffic went up while I was on vacation this week. Lac Mégantic has showed me that I am meant to continue and pour my whole being into Collecting Glitter. No more fear. I am a blogger.

This trip was everything I needed. I’m not a religious person, not at all. I have plenty of problems with religion after my childhood being raised in a church. Though that story is for another day. I still felt a cosmic calling. My life needed this break from real life to see what I really want.

Someday I will buy a place here ad a second home. I leave with that. Lac Mégantic changed me for the best and I will return every chance I can get.

Rainy Vacation Packing List

IMG_5010.JPGIt may look like I’m packing a lot but trust me this is very light from what I usually pack. I wanted to keep it light but I’m still going for five days so I still need stuff. IUnfortunately, it’s looking like it’s going to be mostly humid and rainy the whole time we’re going which is definitely a bummer. So I needed to pack a few things that I know will keep me warm or covered from the rain.

I get cold very easily so I always need a pair of warm comfy pants, fluffy socks, and a sweater. Especially since we’re going to be hanging around at my grandparents camping some nights. Sitting by the fire in the comfiest, dry and warm clothes is the absolute best.

I packed 5 outfits including, top, bottom, and underwear. I also stuck to 2 bras for the vacation. I debated a sports bra but ended up deciding not to bring it. It was taking up space for an item I probably was not going to use anyways.

I also decided on bringing only 3 pairs of shoes, flip flops, very flexible sneakers that are the best travel sneaker ever and one pair of heels. My family is notorious for going to at least one fancy dinner when we go on vacation that’s why I always bring one nice outfit and some nice shoes. This year I’m bringing my new black booties and a comfortable flowy dress.

I have two bathing suits and one cover up. Usually, I’d bring 3 or 4 but I never really wore all of the time. I typically stick to my favorites. I don’t know why everytime I go on vacation I pack like I actually wear more than 2 outfits in a week. I am always in the same PJs or like my work uniform.

I stuck to my classic PJ pants and comfy shirt. I didn’t pack a warm PJ because I already am bringing sweat pants. No need to pack double to amount when something can be multipurpose.

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What I’m bringing for bathroom essentials. I’m bringing a small bag with makeup in it. It really has the basics in it, concealer, powder, a small eye palette, mascara and a lipstick. I know I won’t really be wearing makeup but I figured if I wanted to dress up a bit for dinner or something I should at least have something to play with.

I’m also taking my favorite sunscreen by Aloe Up and their after sun jelly. My toiletries including toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo, conditioner, deodorant, and body wash. I’m also taking a body cream because I like to hydrate my skin after being in the sun all day. I really love Bath and Body Works products. They are absolutely amazing. I have very sensitive skin and these work like a charm which is rare for creams that have strong scents to them.

 

I’m also bringing the books I mentioned in my previous post and a little notebook to jot down some ideas in while I’m gone. I will not be bringing my computer so I will be kicking it old school pen and paper.

Last but not least my cameras. I will be bringing my cameras on vacation to film a Through My Eyes video. I will also have my phone charger in there and a few other things like headphones. I hate tagging all of it along but it’s the best way to get those videos done.

How to get away on a family vacay – My top 6 tips!

If you have a family like mine family vacation sounds fun up until you’re at the night before or early that morning and your parents are freaking out trying to pack the car. It starts off in chaos everyone is in the car there’s already been at least one meltdown from a younger sibling.

It’s lunch time, you’re two hours into the car ride. You’ve heard Ed Sheeran on the radio about 10 times in the last hour. Your siblings have had a total of 3 meltdowns one last 15 minutes because they were hot. Then a fight breaks out your sister wants McDonald’s your brother Burger King, you just want some peace and quiet.

Your parents decide on Wendy’s. Another meltdown by both siblings. You just want wifi so you can check Instagram. You eat in the car. You know you’re going to have to pee in about an hour because of the soft drink. So you stop again, parents annoyed.

Eventually, you get there and the rest of the week is crap. It rains 3 out of 5 days. You’re cranky, tired and just want to eat a meal that doesn’t have sand in it. You got a sunburn the first day so no sun for you. You want to murder one of your siblings for a decent night of sleep.

Thankfully you’re leaving. You pack the car in the rain. It’s freezing. Everything is wet. Your parents literally throw everything in without the same amount of care as when your first left. They say you’ll stop by one last sight to see before officially getting on the road back.

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So here are my tips on how to make a family vacation fun, relaxing and less a colossal mess you remember it being.
1. Stop stressing about things going wrong

Things happen. Plans get ruined. It rains the whole time, the place you booked sucks, there’s no running water, the bathroom is a mile away. Whatever the problem maybe you have to make the most of it.

2. Attitude is everything

If you bitch and moan and complain the whole time, you’re not going to be happy. Your attitude towards things definitely has an impact on the situation. Stay positive and be happy.

3. You’re going to do things you hate and won’t do the things you want to do

The crappy part of family vacations is not getting your vote. Everyone wants to go fishing but you wouldn’t be caught dead. It’s one of those things that you’re just going to have to let go. Make the most of it. Bring a book, try and fish. Whatever makes the situation seem and feel better.

4. Get a good enough amount of sleep

If you’re chilling it by the fire and everything one is just telling stories, you can slip away and go to bed. No one is forcing you to stay out till the fire dies. Go to bed early if you can. More times than not you have to wake up early on vacation to do all that sight seeing. If you’re always going to bed late and waking up early, you’re not going to feel rested.

5. Try and make healthier food options

I know that seems impossible but you can still eat take out and make better choices. Try and do a groceries and eat from the place you’re staying as much as possible. You’ll feel all around better.

6. Take breaks – Quiet time

Sometimes you need a good book or nap on vacation. Take it. If you take at least a 30-minute break from everyone you won’t feel like jumping at everyone’s throat.

My Get Away Reading List

I love bringing light happy reads when I go on vacation. Fluffy, lovey, annoyingly
cute reads that go by quick. Contemporary is my go to grab for vacations. I have a 3-hour drive there and back so I need something that can hold me over for the whole ride. Yes, I’m one of those freaks that can read in the car. I know, I know, most people get headaches or car sick if they

 

Yes, I’m one of those freaks that can read in the car. I know, I know, most people get headaches or car sick if they read. For me, it’s the opposite. I’ve been taking long car rides since birth. I am trained to be able to just sit in a car and be okay, no bathroom, no food, just read a book and listen to be music or a movie.

So I picked up three little fluffy books for my trip this year.

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One of my favourite magazines of all time is Cosmo. I am an avid reader. I have a
monthly subscription. My ultimate dream is to be able to work for Cosmo. I got the August and September issues in the mail and I’ve been waiting for the trip to read them. I do in fact read a magazine cover to cover. I’m one of those old people.

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I plan to either review or go a bit more in-depth with these books when I come back from vacation.

Once and For All by Sarah Dessen*: Once and for All

The Identicals by Elin Hilderbrand*: The Identicals: A Novel

How to love by Katie Cotugno*: How to Love

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